I’m hypo-manic at the moment, so talking about depression is a little like swimming up river. You have to work twice as hard to compensate for the current.

One thing to know is that depression is the ying/yang of mania. So mania feels light, where as depression feels heavy. But being two sides of the same coin, each feels “pressured”. The best way I’ve found to describe the pressure of depression is to compare it to being at the bottom of the Mariana Trench. The trench at it’s lowest point is almost six miles deep. Down that far there is an enormous amount of water pressure, and it is cold, way below freezing. And everything is pitch black, everything except for the luminous creatures that live at that incredible depth.

The pressure is so intense you can’t think as you normally would. Your memory is stunted, and all you can think about is the pain all that pressure is putting on you… The pain can get so intense that it feels like the only way to end it is to end your own life. It’s at this point when a depressive will take their own life, or at least try to. I’m in the group that tried and was lucky enough to have failed.

Under all that pressure, how does anyone rise back to the surface? The answer is one inch at a time until you slowly build momentum. Then the problem becomes rising to the surface too fast. If you have too much momentum you’ll crash through the surface and blast into the atmosphere. Your so glad to be out of all that pressure you launch from the surface and head straight into another pressure, the pressure of flying higher and higher into the atmosphere until you approach space and where there is the “pressure of there being no atmosphere”, and the heat of the sun is hundreds if nor thousands of degrees.

Depression is sitting on the bottom of the trench in all that pressure and cold. This is where I was just a few months ago. Now I’m trying to keep from flying into he sun.